okay, here to blog again.
im in hospital right now, kinda bored.
i can't even take care of myself, how do i even have the chance to take care of u?
well i doubt so.

thanks God to let me know that i had lost someone so important to me.
i know that u're stress, so tat why i can only think of the idea to break up with u.
in this way u won't be so stress anymore.
i know it will break your heart into million of pieces.
but still i carry out this plan.

i took this gamble, it's the biggest gamble that i ever had.
without me around, u will have a peace of mind to study.
somemore i make u hate me so much ytd.
so it seems my plan worked?
i didn't mean to hurt u.

i can feel that u're really very stress and tired. i don't wan to be your burden anymore.
maybe i took the wrong gamble and it will let me regret it later on.
but still, i guess this is the best way to let u study.
u're a gal who love freedom alot. u wan freedom.
well in a relationship, there won't be much freedom.
so i guess u will be free and happy than now.

oh well, my birthday coming.
if i can only have one wish for this year,
it will be having u back into my life again.
i know it won't happen but still this is wad i wish for.

all i hope we will have the same loving life again.
where we will return back to normal?
sticking together like super glue.
although there will be conflict but it's better than now.
haha, it's just my wishful thought.

i'm feeling so lonely now.
every now and then, even when i'm studying,
i will see your beautiful face appear in front of my book
and your image in my mind.
wad's wrong with me?

i guess this is the proof that i am deeply deeply in love with u.
u won't be visiting my blog so i guess this is the only place where i can write out how much i miss u how much i love u how much i need u.

well i got the ring around my neck.
maybe u will take off the ring but still,
i will carrying it around around my neck.
it's the only thing that i can have in this relationship.

hope i will wake up from this nightmare after the exam.
like wad u say before, u just love me even through there will be better bf out there.
i will like to say to u face to face that,
even there are better gf out there, i will still choose u.
my choice will still be u.
why?
becos the one i love is u.
no one can ever replace this love in my heart.

hmmm, gonna get out of this boring place asap,
if not i will get crazy soon.
hey friends out there who will read my blog,
pls take good care of her alright?
remind her to drink more water.
remind her to take good care of herself.

i am feeling much better now,
after saying out wad i wan to say.
don't dare to tell u about this plan cos i know u will object it.
i put my love as a bet in this gamble.
whether will i win or lose,
now and forever u'll still be the one.

u'll always gonna be my love
i will remember to love that u taught me how,
u will always gonna be the one.
now and forever.

how i wanted to call u,
how i wanted to sms u,
how i wanted to see u,
how i wanted to hold u,
how i wanted to hug u,
how i wanted to kiss u,
how i wanted to let u touch my heart,
how i wanted to let u know i still love u so much,
how i wanted to keep u forever by my side.

but guess, i really end everything with my hand.
alvin, there's no use crying so badly now.
no use crying over it.
she won't return back to your life anymore.
oh damn, i haate this feeling,
it's the 1st time i feel so terrible.
it's the 1st time i got this kind of feeling.

alvin, wwake up.
wake up.
accept the fact that she will never come back to my life again.
oh God,
pls save me.
i don't wan. i really don't wan.
i wan her back. pls.
i don't wan to lose her.
i don't wan.
this is the 1st time i am so deeply in love.
yet, it ended this way.
i don't want!

wanlin, can u come back to my life?
can u?
i really miss u alot.
i really need u alot.
i am feeling so painful now.
i know i am the one causes it.
why?
why do i choose to gamble?
why?
why do i have to make myself end up this way?
why do i have to make myself cry like a piece of shit?

oh come on, i am in a public place.
everyone's looking at me.

if God and Fate give me one more chance.
i will without thinking about it,
yes i do,
yes i love her.
yes i will still wan to be with her.
yes yes yes.

goodbye my love.
it's time for me to learn without u by my side.